It is not news that South Korea is very fixated on looks and presentation. Just one look at the glossy k-pop scene, and you know what the beauty standards are. My recent visit to Korea earlier this year also highlighted the pervasiveness on the importance of presentation and superficial looks, what with all the commercials and advertisements for cosmetic surgeries and people preening themselves whenever they stop long enough to see any sort of reflections on the train window or their cellphone screen.
It is also not news, I guess, that the golden standard of beauty set and perpetuated by celebrities seem to push toward thinner and lighter every year, resulting in idol stars looking more and more like sickly vampires. (Am I just aging and starting to fall behind to appreciate the beauty in this new trend?)
It’s no surprise, then, to find these celebrities all share their “secrets” to their “perfect figures” resembling toothpicks: these fad diets that include only having one meal per day, to cutting out food groups, to eating only one food (be it bananas, apples, or sweet potatoes). And as a mental health professional working in the United States dealing with teens struggling with trauma, body dismorphia, and eating disorders, I can’t help but identify the general trend of the k-pop culture veering into the mental disorder realm.
I say this with caution, and also with some conviction. I’ve been eyeing this trend for a while now and tried to refrain from adding to the conversation prematurely. I am hyper-aware that I am very westernized in my thinking and my norms of mental health. And I am also aware that this is somewhat of a global trend, with the emerging culture of selfies and on-line presence where pictures are more representative of who and what you are than off-line “real life” presence. There is dramatic increase of eating disorders and body dismorphia everywhere.
And, despite the possibility that eating disorders are starting to be more normal (in the strictly literal sense of the word), the detrimental implications on the biological and physical health of these trends and ideas are unavoidable.
So then, it was greatly refreshing to have a recently released boyband from JYP sing songs that send a completely different message!
Got7 – 난 니가 좋아 (I like you)
Hey, listen to me: I like you
I like your cute height and small nose and cherry lips
때 얼마나 예쁜 지 몰라 너무 달콤해서 할 때마다 깜짝 놀라
How pretty they are when I put my lips on yours without any fancy techniques
It’s so sweet that I am surprised every time
But why don’t you know you are special?
I’ll pick you over any other girl
You might not be gorgeous, but you gently shine
like the moon in the night sky, like the wild flowers in the fields
You say you’re mediocre, but I’m telling you that you are special
Like a gem that is noticed by ones who are in the know
You say you are not pretty, that your eyes are small and your nose is small and you’re not even thin
You say you’re chubby and short and other girls are prettier than you
You ask me why I like you, but stop worrying like that. Let it go and believe me,
You’re different than them, different than all the air-headed kids these days
You are like a refreshing drink of clean water
I become like the cracking earth in drought when you’re not near
You don’t know how happy you make me
More than beautiful actresses and skinny models
I like your sunny smile
To me, you are more beautiful than any other women in this world
Believe me despite whatever anyone says
lyrics by J.Y. Park
translated by wycker
When I first heard this single, I definitely felt like there was a bit of breathing room that opened up in such a restricting beauty standard. Then, more recently, Got7 released a new single:
Got7 – 딱 좋아 (Just Right)
거울아 거울아 제발 좀 말해주려무나
Mirror, mirror, please tell her
저울아 너도 말해주려무나
Scale, you too tell her
아무것도 바꿀 필요 없이예쁘다고
She is beautiful without anything to change
지금 그 모습 그대로 완벽하다고
She is perfect just the way she is
마냥 행복하면 돼
You just need to be happy
걱정 없이 부족한 점이 뭔지 찾기 없기
With no worry, without searching for what’s lacking
거울 대신 그냥 내 눈 빛을 바라봐
Look into my eyes instead of the mirror
저울 대신 내 등 위에 올라타봐 봐
Get on my back instead of the scale
아무리 널 뜯어봐도 보고 또 보고 또 봐도
니가 말하는 안 예쁜 부분이 어딘지
그게 어딘지 찾을 수가 없어 난
I can’t find the part that you’re calling ugly
I don’t know where it is
even if I look and scrutinize and look some more
지금처럼만 있어주면 난 바랄게 없으니
I won’t want anything else if you just stayed the way you are
넌 아무것도 바꾸지 마
Don’t change any thing
아무 걱정마
Don’t worry about anything
너의 모든게 다 좋으니까
I like everything about you
너는 아무것도 바꾸지 마
So don’t change anything
이대로 (지금 이대로)
오- (그냥 이대로)
오- (지금 이대로)
오오오 있으면 돼
You just need to stay the same
딱 좋아 너의 모든 게
It’s just enough and I like your everything
그러니 네 맘 놓아
So let it go
아무 걱정하지 마
Don’t worry about anything
이 말 백 퍼센트 다 그대로 믿어도 돼
You can believe me 100 percent
모든 걱정 백 퍼센트 다 지워도 돼
You can erase your worries 100 percent
옥에 티도 티가 나야 찾는 거지 원
Flaws can’t be found since there are none
눈부시게 빛나 빈틈이 없지 넌
You are blindingly beautiful, and you have nothing lacking
내 눈에 얼마나 예쁜지 I want you
You are so beautiful to me, I want you
지금 이대로 you’re the only one
Just like this, you’re the only one
lyrics by J.Y. Park
translated by wycker
These are just two songs, and maybe it’s not yet enough to change the tide of descending into madness of body hate and dismorphia. I mean, the singers who are singing these songs are just as skinny and adhere within the beauty standard of the k-pop scene. And who knows whether they truly believe the lyrics they sing since they are written by someone else. But at least there’s an alternative story, a hopeful one, that is whispered to those girls who look up to these boys and idolizes them. That being yourself is just enough. And perhaps that whisper is enough to start looking into themselves for acceptance than focusing on outward appearances and acceptance by others.
